Situation #3.1: We are already doing a great thing by sending our child to Chinese language school. I just don’t understand why he is so unhappy going there.Reality: Chinese schools do provide an environment for families with similar backgrounds to come together to share the burden and beliefs of their children learning the home language. And these schools do help the children become somewhat literate in the language. However, they do impose certain restrictions that are not favorable toward language learning.First, the schools are usually held in addition to children’s normal school hours, some in the afternoons and others on the weekends. The children are not only already tired from the school days in the week, but also may regard Chinese school as an extra nuisance to have to go to that their other friends do not need to take part in, no matter how noble the reasons are on why they should learn the language.Second, once the children start going to Chinese schools, many parents start to shift the sole responsibility of teaching Chinese over to the staff. They sometimes forget to continue to speak to their children in Chinese at home, or to encourage them enough by offering them opportunities to speak at different real-life settings. Expecting their children to learn a language in school for only a few hours a week with little practice outside of class will not yield wholesome results. What is even more disturbing to find is that most schools hold the same view. Even knowing that their students do not use Chinese outside of class, they do not offer any plans to assist the parents in understanding the importance of this part of language acquisition.Bilingual schools can help in some way if Chinese is incorporated smoothly into the main school curriculum, allowing it to earn the same status as English. In this case, children would not view Chinese learning as much of a foreign and extra burden, but as part of their everyday learning. However, even bilingual schools may have the same situation where students often do not speak Chinese outside of school. Parents feel unaware of or helpless when their children refuse to use Chinese with them, or may have thought that this is the norm.
Therefore, attendance at Chinese school can only be an aid to help your child acquire the home language. It cannot substitute a regular home exposure of the language. Without family support, in the end, your child would get at most a slight knowledge of language, though hopefully not having been instilled with a negative attitude along with it. This is especially true when the Chinese curriculum does not go beyond an elementary level.

Situation #3.6: My child already goes to Chinese school, and she knows Chinese, but I don’t understand why she doesn’t use it outside of class.Reality: A language needs to be meaningful in life to be used. If there is no immediate usage, the child would naturally drop using it altogether. It is very desirable, and almost imperative, that the family should be learning and using the language together to help make the language a fact of life. At an early age, a child may accept very satisfactorily the bond and affection associated with the home language. As she grows older, she may need more formal explanations, and that is where your original mission of the necessity to learn the home language comes to place. It emphasizes the importance and the value you place on her learning the language.

You may communicate your concern with her Chinese school teacher, and work with the school to see how they can help. The issue is definitely urgent and needs to be addressed as soon as possible. A child needs outside-of-classroom experience to take full advantage of all that she is learning from the school. Otherwise, the progress will bound to be very slow and dissatisfactory for both of you. The process may turn dull and learning Chinese will eventually become just another academic subject.