Situation #1.6: I am not sure if my child can be very competent in Chinese. I think I will let her go at her own pace. I would be very satisfied if she can write her own name.Reality: Raising a child bilingually is no easy task. And raising a child to be biliterate (able to read and write as well as to listen and speak) seems like going against a storm. Bilingualism and biliteracy come with planning and do not come naturally, not in an English-dominant society anyway. The force is against you and your child for the most part.

In a study conducted in 2002, the researchers found that most of what has happened in the past based on a three-generation Anglicization is still happening today. Basically, an immigrant family raises their children while speaking their native language at home, but their children prefer English and may even speak to their parents in English if the parents know some English. When it is the children’s turn to raise their own household, they mostly use English with their children at home and hence their children would turn out to be monolingual, with at best, fragments of the native language. The study shows that by the third generation, more than 91% of Chinese children (ages 6-15) in a foreign land speak only English at home. Further, statistics have not even included biliterate children in this regard.

The reality is, if you are satisfied with her sole capability of writing her Chinese name, she will very likely be able to do just and only that.

Situation #1.5: I can speak Chinese, but since I am not a native speaker, I am afraid to use that at home with my child for fear that he is not getting the most correct form of the language.Reality: It is true that being a non-native speaker can pose some disadvantages, such as incorrect usages of certain vocabulary terms or phrases, or mispronunciation of certain words. You may also be less confident expressing fully what you want to communicate. Nonetheless, unless you have someone who is a native Chinese and who can speak to the child at the length similar to the exposure you have with your child, it may not a bad idea to start with what you can offer, and complement it with English for those gaps. To the child, it may only be a fact of life to use that specific language with you, even partially. While certain improper language may stay with him for a certain period, he may resolve that eventually if there is a larger community of that language around him. Comparatively, it can be a better advantage for your child to acquire the language with certain twists now than not at all. You and your child can study it together.

You need to be aware though that switching to another language, especially suddenly, between two people is like wiping out their past experiences together. Therefore, it will never work for a family to switch to speaking Chinese from English completely if your family has been used to speaking English solely. It may work better for you to start speaking Chinese with your child, however, but not between you and the other parent, because that relationship is likely to be much more stable by this time. It will feel quite awkward and it is known to be almost impossible to maintain.